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Gratitude and Transformation


“At times, our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.” Albert Schweitzer


It seems as if gratitude is the positivity topic du jure and certainly, my daily gratitude practice allows me to see every day all of the good that is in my life right now—just as it is. I’ve been feeling so much gratitude lately for my sexual healing process and for all of the gifts that have come to me as a result. Thus, this week of Thanksgiving, I am focusing on my Top Ten Statements of Gratitude for sexual healing.


1. I am grateful for Ed: for being willing to risk his heart in 2007 to ask me one more time to reconnect. That led us to attending the workshop on Love, Sexuality and Intimacy that opened my heart and changed our lives—setting me firmly on this path of personal healing—which brought the two of us much closer.


2. I am grateful for Ed: for holding space for me—free of jealousy or fear—to do sexual healing work, trusting in the strength of our commitment.


3. I am grateful for all of the loving, gifted and generous facilitators, interns and assistants with the Human Awareness Institute that dedicate so much time and life energy creating a safe place for people to deeply connect and heal the deepest of wounds.


4. I am grateful for all of the courageous men and women I’ve met who are on their own sexual healing journeys—for their inspiration and strength. Watching others embrace vulnerability and undergo mind-blowing transformation motivates me to continue my work personally and professionally.


5. I am grateful for finding my passion through healing: the deep desire to help others embrace their sexuality and sex free of the past as a path to greater intimacy and connection with themselves and with their partner(s).


6. I am grateful that sex for me is now completely normalized: who I am, what I think, what I desire, what I do is perfect for me—just as I am, just as it is. In making peace with my sexuality, I’ve come home to my heart.


7. I am grateful for Dr. Patti Britton, the founder of sex coaching, and Dr. Robert Dunlap, the co-founders of Sex Coach U, for their pioneering work in this revolutionary emerging discipline that unites sexology with coaching. Their approach enables us to help clients resolve sexual issues in a way that is practical and compassionate, recognizing that most sexual problems do not result from psychological or medical dysfunction—most sexual issues instead arise from lack of education, experience and a culture of shaming.


8. I am grateful for the opportunity to speak openly about sex and sexuality in varied settings, educating a range of people from college students to seniors.


9. I am grateful for all of my friends, old and new, near and far—for all the richness you add to my life. Women’s group, cycling friends, workshop pals, past colleagues, partners in fun: from west coast to east and all points in between, I love and cherish you all.


10. I am grateful for the greater closeness I’ve experienced with my 81 year old mother in sharing with her about my sexual healing process—and for her unwavering support for me. This, my friends, feels like nothing short of a miracle.

Coming next: A multi-part series on sex and communication

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